"Always choose light over darkness, love over fear, truth over illusion. Express your authentic light in every moment – it is your right. You are here for your own unique purpose, be you…you are perfection."
This spiritual game can seem complicated. Always being presented with a choice and the pressure to make the right choice. But that’s heavy – and it’s not supposed to be heavy. It’s supposed to be fun, and exhilarating, and joyous.
Enter, the observer. The observer can be a witness to any and all thoughts, emotions and feelings. It remains unaffected and neutral. As the observer, you stand in equilibrium, watching, without giving away any of your power. You stop taking things personally. You expand your empathy. Your heart stretches. Your perspective expands.
When you observe yourself, you create an unbiased platform from which to operate. You now have the power to change your programmed responses, to bring conscious awareness to the way you communicate and participate in your life. You can watch your thoughts and more importantly be aware of your feelings to lead you to further self awareness.
But why? Why all the self awareness? Why not just be in our human bodies and do the hard work? Because it doesn’t have to be hard at all. All the information we need to live a completely satisfied existence is right in front of us. We hold that information in our bodies, thoughts and emotions. There is data that we have collected throughout our journeys and when we are in autopilot we continue to run the same program, with the same data.
If we want a different reality, we have to start reprogramming. The first, most important step is to observe – to listen. When we begin to understand our triggers, our pain, our joy, our anger, we begin unravelling the ties that bind us to our recurring reality. We start healing childhood wounds and traumas. We stop waiting for love and devote ourselves to self love. We begin actively creating our reality and in that we are find the freedom and joy of being who we are meant to be.
Today was a heavy day. Today, I witnessed my shadow self and felt such extreme pain, that even battling and negotiating with God, didn’t feel enough to address it. It was beyond that. I went through the motions of sadness and hopelessness and betrayal and unworthiness, and my past traumas were triggered – and relived, as a fresh experience of that past pain.
We practice it. We earn it. We work for it. But, it has never been marketed as being easy. Being self-aware doesn’t mean that we don’t feel or react. It doesn’t mean that we are held to a standard of perfection. Self-awareness, addresses the entire human experience. It allows emotions to guide us. It allows our feelings to be heard as intuition. It allows for the ego to be used as a tool to preserve and protect our integrity and dignity.
In witnessing my shadow self, as an external bystander, I saw my pain in a different way. I saw the trauma of a wounded inner child. I saw the scars of past trauma being opened once again. I felt sorrow and then empathy. I felt compassion and an expansion of love. It wasn’t that my feelings today were not real. They were very much a real part of my experience. They were however, amplified and perpetuated by past hurts, trauma and wounds.
In the times I was most disconnected from myself, I presented my shadow self much more than the light. Blame is never an appropriate response to being unaware. Imagine a child, scared, hurt and confused. How would you address that child? We have to recognize that pain is often rooted so far back that we experience it, even in adulthood, from the emotional body of our inner child. In my experience, the only way to create a safe space for yourself, is to offer compassion, empathy and love. Love is the antidote to fear.
Judgement is a dangerous game. When we create a paradigm where judgement guides us, it creates further disconnect from our authentic self or light self. Meet judgement with grace. When you eliminate judgement, acceptance quickly follows. Acceptance leads to awareness. Awareness leads to reconditioning our past reactions and breaks the cycle.
We are beings of light, beings of love. Let’s embrace everything we are and love outselves to pieces. Not only are we worthy, it is who we are. We can only heal with love.
2019 for me, has been the year of boundaries. Developing a practice of introspection and self-care has only opened my mind and heart to importance of setting healthy boundaries that create the best experience of life for me. Boundaries don’t have a one size fits all approach.
How do you go about setting healthy boundaries? Get to know yourself again. Start by identifying your triggers, spend time with your trauma, pay attention to when you feel like you have an abundance of energy, what situations make you feel depleted, what self-care rituals are non-negotiable, what situations and activities make you feel empowered, what conversations make you feel defensive or unsupported.
In working on setting healthy boundaries for myself, I have found that I am less triggered and more grounded. I am much more aware of my responses and am able to conciously respond in situations rather than react from a triggered place.
It has been a process of reclaiming my power. Taking control of my life by placing boundaries has made me feel safer. It’s created more space, as what is not meant for me doesn’t enter my energetic vortex. As a result, I’ve had the courage and strength to be more vulnerable, more honest and more myself. The freedom to be my authentic self has strengthened my intuition and propelled my self-awareness, as I no longer have to constantly worry about getting hurt or not being in control.
What experience have you had with setting boundaries? Leave a comment below 🙏♥️ . . . . . . . #selflove #boundaries #awareness #conciousness #evolution #expansion #joy #triggers #safe #love #universe #freedom #trauma #childhood #reparenting #lightworker #intuitive #healing #selfhealers #infinitelightstudio
How do we experience shifts in our circumstances and behaviours? Sure, diving head first into deep introspective work to heal will open our hearts and minds. But often, all that heavy lifting can feel exactly that, HEAVY and daunting.
The practice of deep gratitude, has proven to be a simple and easy way to change the way we, as creators, manifest our own reality.
Gratitude is very simply – being thankful. Connecting with a feeling of joyous satisfaction and staying with it. On the one hand, the human mind, is much like a muscle. The more we train it in any area, the stronger it will become. On the other hand, our vibrational state is ever responding to input from our thoughts, our subconscious and superconcious.
From a conscious point of view, our reality is a mirrored manifestation of our vibrational state. The practice of gratitude provides easy access to one key element to manifesting with ease. That is the feeling of satisfaction. When we tap in to that feeling, we start fine tuning our vibrational point of attraction to align with that clear focused feeling of joy and bliss. The more we tune into this frequency, the easier it becomes to default to a state of good feeling. Think of this as reprogramming our spiritual and neural pathways.
Consistently practicing gratitude, transforms us emotionally, spiritually and physically. The result of this is deep gratitude. It becomes so pervasive that we rewire ourselves so much so, that the hard work of healing becomes easier, softer and organic. Surrender becomes easy and grace comes in to do the work for us as we stay in a focused point of good feeling.
Gratitude that resonates with the soul, changes everything.
I ask you this because this is one of the things that I always come back to. I gravitate towards this time and time again. It’s like a pulse check if you will… gauging my own actions and choices, checking in to make sure I’m on track.
∞ Why am I here? ∞
What makes you so uniquely you? What mission did you choose to take on in this lifetime? We are all born with our gifts, each one of us unique and powerful. No two people will affect the same change. You are a wonderful being here to share your own special light.
I was raised with a strong moral compass, albeit slightly more derived from the fear of sin part of the adage over the love of God part. Of course there was much love and I loved fiercely and freely, but fear of wrongdoing seemed really, really… bad. I always knew what the ‘good’ thing to do was, especially the part that looked good to be doing. But growing up, fear of sin was a big one for me…I was an expert at silent cues and slipping into shadows. I really was good though and as a child I knew it. The catch was, my whole life felt like an exercise in proving it.
I remember feeling the light within me as child, feeling free and happy and knowing I was boundless. As I went through life, I found myself questioning this feeling as I felt the pressure to be and do what was expected of me and do what everyone else was doing. Go to school, get good grades, have friends, be ‘cool’, be a good role model, get a job, establish a career path, get married, etc. Many times, these paths seemed inauthentic to my own purpose, but I did them anyway on a mission to do the right thing. It was rather desperate actually, I think there was so much of my life that was motivated by the need to be accepted and to prove my own worth – as if my intrinsic goodness wasn’t enough, I had to be more. In the middle of all of this I can say that I lost sight of my own light to the point where I had to stop everything… and listen.
At this time I heard all of the false truths that had taken up space in my mind. I had to focus on my light, feel its power and heed its truth. I stopped fighting. For the first time in a long time, I felt ‘good’ again. I felt like me. I felt that boundless feeling I had experienced as a child so many years ago. Being able to feel my own light kept me on my toes. I found myself putting one foot in front of the other, and just focused on doing what was right for me – what felt aligned with my purpose. It wasn’t a conscious thought process of defining my purpose but more so checking in with my heart on how things felt to me. If it felt good, I went ahead – if not, I moved on. I had coined a couple of mantras for myself at this time that served me well: “just be” and “just do”, which became a way of thinking and allowed me my first cognitive experience of mindfulness.
I found that even my experience of time changed. It was almost as if time was stretchy… yielding so much more for me in a short amount of time than I ever dreamed possible. I was operating from a place of authenticity and the universe had my back. I felt like I was fully supported and loved and I didn’t need any validation to make it real. I don’t think I even paused to think about what was happening, I just kept going. It was easy to be present and to do whatever felt right. I found myself expressing my light in ways that I hadn’t in a long time. People around me started to comment on how happy they felt to be around me. I found joy in nature and learned so much about my connectivity to the earth and everything around me. I became more attuned to my physical surroundings and was determined to create a life that was vibrating on the same frequency as my light.
I know now that the important thing is to just keep doing you. Keep spreading your light. Keep sharing love and joy in every encounter and experience. The point is that every moment is an opportunity to be authentic. We are all here to fulfill our purpose and are doing that daily by being who we are. Couple this with a strong intention to elevate our vibration so that we are an expression of the purest love, void of fear and judgement. There is no set place or path for your purpose. Don’t wait for things to line up to do what you must. Some of us are born yogi’s, some savvy business people, some are incredible musicians and artists. Whatever your path, spread your light – that is your purpose. Every day, every place, rise up to be who you were always meant to be.
What I’ve come to trust is that the light within us has always been there and will always continue to be there. Purpose can seem like a daunting task, but I assure you, on the contrary, that you will be free and uplifted the second you allow yourself full permission to be you. Have the courage NOW, it is certain your light will be instrumental in the rising of consciousness everywhere.
The holiday season is our favourite time of year ♥ There are so many traditions – new and old, that are so special to our family. Decorating our Christmas tree while drinking hot chocolate (and of course marshmallows for Shreya), listening to Christmas carols, putting up the lights on the house, Christmas dinner with the family and so many more. This year we are hoping to create a new one that we can share with everyone called – #25daysofgratitude.
This year in our home we have been talking a lot about gratitude. Even amidst the fast approaching Christmas season we want to make a conscious effort to continue to live in a mindful way – being sure that we are consistently living in alignment with our core values. I am sure that we are not the only family thinking and feeling this way. For all of you who read this and feel that this resonates with you, please join us in celebrating love, joy and togetherness in a way that feels authentic to our truest self.
Here are a few things that have come up around our dinner table:
∞ Feeling and showing gratitude ∞
Gratitude starts by taking a moment to centre yourself and to bring your attention to the present moment. When you are able to see and feel everything you have, there is nothing but a sense of gratitude and contentment. Being able to tap into this feeling is what allows us to show gratitude. With our 6 year old daughter Shreya, we talk about gratitude regularly and this time it was centred around Christmas and how we can show gratitude at this time of year. Here’s what Shreya came up with:
Show gratitude by sharing or giving to people that don’t have as much as us
Show gratitude by sharing love with others
Show gratitude by appreciating your “stuff’
Show gratitude by helping others
∞ Maintaining a minimalist mindset ∞
Being able to maintain the practice of minimalism is especially challenging during this season. Mostly because gift giving has become a matter of etiquette and while gifts are well intentioned and given with lots of love, they aren’t always necessary or useful. I’ve spoken to several people about this and it seems that many gifts are given with love, received with love but then often forgotten in a closet or basement for years to come.
Being able to separate our own thinking from consumerism is especially important. Society has done a phenomenal job of building consumerism and instilling the need to acquire “stuff” in ever increasing amounts. What our conversation uncovered was that this behaviour encourages the opposite of gratitude. After thinking about this for some time, Shreya concluded that she has more than enough things and that she would instead like to give to those who have less. Here are some of the things that we would like to do:
Sort out toys and clothing and donate to those in need
Prepare meals for those who don’t have food and shelter and hand deliver them
Buy a treat (coffee, donut, timbits) for someone having a bad day
Share #25daysofgratitude to spread more love and joy!
∞ Mindful gift giving ∞
After all of this discussion, the final thing we landed on is that gift giving can be a beautiful expression of love. Being mindful in our daily life is an important practice in gratitude. By being mindful we are drawing our joy from every moment rather than waiting for joy in the form of a gift, expectations or a future event. We wanted to make sure that the gifts that we gave were meaningful, thoughtful and caring. Again, here’s a short list of what we came up with:
Make time to spend with people you love (play, cook, bake, paint etc. together)
Create something from the heart to give
Write cards and letters to share how you feel
So, with all of this in mind, the goal is to practice gratitude everyday! Be present and feel the love around us all the time. If you can, please share what you are doing and we will do the same using the hashtag #25daysofgiving or comment below. Officially our family will start on December 1st but this is not something that is restricted to any given time. If you feel inclined to join in, please do – the more the merrier!